Tuesday, June 22, 2010


Lately I've been feeling a little discouraged. I always try not to go into detail about my personal problems here on my blog, but it's just one of those days that are worse than others.

Let me give you a little background on myself. I'm a full time college student & have been for the past 2 years. I'm one of those lucky ones where my mom can fully support me financially so I don't have to worry about paying for school. My mom is a dentist living her dream of owning her own dental practice. Problem is, none of her kids want to be a dentist. I'm not going to say I didn't try because I did. I fooled myself throughout high school thinking I could do it even though I was barely passing my science & math classes (it just doesn't come to me naturally). I gave up my all my creative dreams for it. Finally when it came to college my counselor stuck me in an intermediate chemistry class & biology class. I did horribly! It was so difficult for me & I was so unhappy. I finally decided to switch my major to Art/Art History & for the past two semesters I've been so happy with my schoolwork. Yet I always get a hint of disappointment from my mom every so often & today was one of those days. She's said to me before that she doesn't even believe that I'll graduate. I broke down & cried. Today she assured me again that she doesn't think I'll do anything with my life. Don't get me wrong, I love my mom to death & appreciate every ounce of hard work she's put into supporting our family. She's always encouraged us to do what we wanted & I know that her criticizing me is coming from her worrying about my future. I just don't know how I'm going to prove to her that I will become something. Being surrounded by creative people & being creative is what I've always loved to do. I want to become a teacher so that I can inspire students & also have time to spend time with my own family & travel. Sometimes I just feel like I need a little assurance that I'm doing the right thing.

I don't know... maybe I'm just being a little too emotional, but thanks for reading! (:

In other news! I'm still behind on my RVA Summer Camp projects, but I'm trying to catch up! I'm still behind by 5. ]x But I promise to update you all once I've caught up (for the most part).

3 loves:

cocosparkle said...

That sucks! I, for one, think it is so fantastic you are following your creative dream. Maybe your mom will come around. *hug*
ps) I'm behind too with my projects!

Kristen said...

My mom told me I would make a terrible massage therapist cause I'm whiny and to weak to stand on my feet all day and do real work...now she bugs me CONSTANTLY to give her massages. Guess I showed her!
Follow your dreams...you're the one who has to live your life.

Celina said...

Awe. Thanks for the encouragement! Hopefully my mom will come around when I get my diploma! (:

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